Let's just say it - get it out there: I'm a horrible blogger. (an? an horrible blogger? does that rule still apply?) I haven't stopped to do a keyboard ponder for over a month! I've had things I could share, but they must not have been super important or they would have haunted me until I got 'em down on record.
But today - something special happened today.
I felt peace.
Seriously! I can surely count the number of peace-filled days I've had since giving birth. And not just "days without kids" or sleep-in days (what? what are those? I have a vague recollection of sleeping past 7...), but days that, no matter how deep the chaos, I felt peace.
Let me set the scene: Yesterday, I had planned to meet my parents at Costco (yep - I'm a costco moocher. I totally use their card instead of getting my own.), but Dan had to use the car, so I had to cancel. Later, I was supposed to go to the gym for a much-needed sweat session, but instead was blessed with a drop-in visit from one of my most favoritest friends. "Of COURSE the gym can wait - I'd much rather eat a sushi lunch and watch Monday's SingOff episode with you!" Then I'd thought I would make a run to the local consignment shop to try to sell some of the kids old clothes and accoutrement, but my in-laws dropped in after going to lunch with Dan - and brought him home SICK with them. (Poor guy!) We had scheduled with my parents for a date night (to First Thursday in the Pearl for a couple friends' art shows), also, last night, but I had to cancel that because Dan was sick. THEN his parents offered to take me and the kids with them to the Pearl so I could still go to the galleries. I got the kids fed and bathed, redressed, shoes on, coats on and ready to peel out as soon as Grama and Grampa arrived. The doorbell rang and at that same moment, Jack threw up on my (and his) feet. 4 times. (I won't tell you how helpful the dog was at this moment, because that is disgusting.) So - yes. I still went and took Lily along and we had a wonderful time!
So - maybe the peace I feel today is just relative? I don't know. Today had it's own gentle chaos with two sick guys moping around the house. But still... yes still... my soul is still. and I am breathing in and breathing out. and life is good. and I am loving it. All of it.